Monday, December 17, 2012

Completing A Part Of Our Journey

Today we completed a part of our journey and in a way started another....
We finalized our adoption. 

We started our morning at 6am a little earlier that normal. Thankful for little graces our middle daughter woke in a great mood!!! She had some quiet time with daddy...and a good breakfast. 
I went in to wake up our eldest daughter with the words "Happy Dappy Adoption Day..." She smiled up out of the covers and "happy too, mama" she was still a little sleepy... :) 

I went into the living room and sat on the floor and took out the 37 curlers I put in their hair the night before...styled their hair, put on little shoes & clothes. I just kept waiting for it to sink in... 
As we are driving to the courthouse it starts POURING DOWN RAIN!!! 
Yep, all of that work, all of that sitting still while mama makes pretty hair was for pretty much nothing.. LOL! 
In some of the pix we pretty much look like...well like we came through a rain storm! 

We found our way to our courtroom and went to sign-in, met up with one of our workers. I am starting to relax...and then I found myself in a battle of "then" {Du du dum}<--ominous music.
Then I noticed it was taking a really long time....ehhh that is just how it goes, I had hair to wrangle. *eh*
Then I noticed one of our workers pulling hubby aside... Weird, but my 2yr old needs me. *hmm*
Then I see social workers whispering in the corner and my blood pressure starts to rise.... *ACCK!*
Then one of the workers come over to talk to me...and says "everything is fine, mama." *PANIC!*
Then the other worker finally came and told me that they couldn't find is in the computer! *GASP!*
Then I got REALLY upset...I am smiling but inside, a storm! I pray. *Will self not to cry* 

 It all worked out...our workers are pretty amazing and tenacious!!! *breath*

We go inside and sit and the judge says a bunch of stuff about....inheritance or something?? My head was swirling, and my heart was lost to me. It was a beautiful blend of surreal & defined. This was forever. This was my life. This was my family. This was forever... 

We go on to sign some papers and then we are on to taking pictures. My face is red in like every picture! I was fighting back emotion....stressed from before...and like a gazillion degrees!!! It's okay, I would have stayed in the sauna..ummm I mean courtroom all day if I had too. I had my babies. I have them forever. 

We were a bit rushed at the end as other families were waiting...friends and family met outside the courtroom to say congratulations. They hugged and held our little girls. They made our day so special!!! I am so thankful for such wonder people in our lives. I watched as my babies giggled and laughed. They ran and twirled in the open area fully loved and accepted.

 I sat outside the courtroom as waited for the last of our paperwork~ quiet, thinking. I kept waiting for this feeling that didn't come. I kept somehow thinking that I should feel different. I should feel something...then I realized I already did. You see for a long time now...
they have been mine.
Now it is simply legal. 









Friday, December 14, 2012

A Bitterly Painful Reminder...


Today I saw mothers standing quiet and sober, eye holding fast to the gate, hearts breaking, and arms longing to hold their little ones in their arms. They were there early, standing, bodies barely feeling the cold. They were standing there because on the other side of the country there were other mothers that couldn't hold their babies...a gunman took them away.

This morning's tragedy was a bitter, and painful reminder to love our children and to hold them a little tighter..

As we our children were released into the schoolyard to us no one talked, no idle mommy chatter. No those mothers wanted their little ones home~ safe. The mothers were once again no doubt reminded of those mothers who's child's arms would not surround their necks.. They were reminded of how precious life is..and thankful.

I saw the  look of relief as their child walked through the gate and some blinking back tears as they hugged their child.
I myself was lost in that moment...as I hugged and kissed my little girl as she excitedly kept right on talking about her day. I am so thankful that God brought her into our lives and even more thankful that in 3 days she will be mine forever! I am thankful that she is safe and loved. I am just thankful..


We no doubt pray for the families in CT and all of those affected. We pray for our country.


Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Our Christmas Song

As Christmas gets closer...as well as our adoption I just can't seem to hold my excitement!!!!
My thoughts go back to last Christmas...some songs that got me through the hard times, and brought a smile to my heart. I felt like I was not alone..
So many times last year I would listen to this song...it was just how I felt. I prayed for my girls...and cried. I hung up their stockings on the fireplace with the words ~Till You Come Home~. I hoped, and dreamed.
Now I understand the last part of the song...the love and joy that comes from our children around the tree.

Friday, December 7, 2012

Those Blessed Words...

~ "You have court date!"
All I have wanted since last Christmas was for my girls to be mine by next Christmas... Signed, sealed, and delivered~ completely and legally mine! If you remember last Christmas was so hard for us...I spent many a night in tears, hopelessly waiting. You can see here.
We were matched, but we couldn't see them...it was heart wrenching. All I wanted was my girls home for Christmas, and the only thing that gave me any comfort(other than my loving husband) was the hope and prayer that we would finalize by Christmas the following year.
Last Christmas God gave me such a precious gift, hope. Then He gave that hope a home. Now He is giving the hope..a forever.
I love my(our) girls so much!!!  I love my little family~ our soon to be forever family!

PaxBaby Give-a-Way!

Sweet Jillian over at paxbaby is having a huge give-a-way right now!


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Saturday, December 1, 2012

Picking Trees Along The Journey...

So our family decided to go pick out out Christmas tree today... I laughed as my two year old pulled on the needles just like her daddy, and smiled as the girls chased each other  through the trees..

We just had to pic the right tree... You see this was our first tree as a family. This is our first Christmas as a family. We want to give our children memories... We want to take our greatest joys in the simple, happy, little things in life. One these~ I think the greatest of these is picking out the Christmas tree!

So we found the perfect one... Had is cut and wrapped. Then they tied it on the van... We were on our way!